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Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Happy New Year SMS
☻May this new year bring many opportunities your way, to explore every joy of life and may your resolutions for the days ahead stay firm, turning all your dreams into reality and all your efforts into great achievements.
☻Every man should be born again on the first day of January. Start with a fresh page. Take up one hole more in the buckle if necessary, or let down one, according to circumstances; but on the first of January let every man gird himself once more, with his face to the front, and take no interest in the things that were and are past.
☻New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
☻The new year begins in a snow-storm of white vows.
☻For last year's words belong to last year's language
And next year's words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.
☻We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.
☻Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever.
☻People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas.
☻And ye, who have met with Adversity's blast,
And been bow'd to the earth by its fury;
To whom the Twelve Months, that have recently pass'd
Were as harsh as a prejudiced jury -
Still, fill to the Future! and join in our chime,
The regrets of remembrance to cozen,
And having obtained a New Trial of Time,
Shout in hopes of a kindlier dozen.
☻Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect, and thank God that it can go.
☻Each age has deemed the new-born year
The fittest time for festal cheer.
☻Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
☻Glory to God in highest heaven,
Who unto man His Son hath given;
While angels sing with tender mirth,
A glad new year to all the earth.
☻A new oath holds pretty well; but... when it is become old, and frayed out, and damaged by a dozen annual retryings of its remains, it ceases to be serviceable; any little strain will snap it.
☻But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year-old habits.
☻I do think New Year's resolutions can't technically be expected to begin on New Year's Day, don't you? Since, because it's an extension of New Year's Eve, smokers are already on a smoking roll and cannot be expected to stop abruptly on the stroke of midnight with so much nicotine in the system. Also dieting on New Year's Day isn't a good idea as you can't eat rationally but really need to be free to consume whatever is necessary, moment by moment, in order to ease your hangover. I think it would be much more sensible if resolutions began generally on January the second.
☻New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.
☻We meet today
To thank Thee for the era done,
And Thee for the opening one.
☻One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things.
☻Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year.
☻A happy New Year! Grant that I
May bring no tear to any eye
When this New Year in time shall end
Let it be said I've played the friend,
Have lived and loved and labored here,
And made of it a happy year.
☻It wouldn't be New Year's if I didn't have regrets.
☻We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential.
☻May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions.
☻He who breaks a resolution is a weakling;
He who makes one is a fool.
☻The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective.
☻I think in terms of the day's resolutions, not the year's.
☻Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunder-storm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or year. Even when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.
☻I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me.
☻New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.
☻Every man regards his own life as the New Year's Eve of time.
☻The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears.
☻Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.
☻An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
☻Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits.
☻A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
☻Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man.
☻No one ever regarded the First of January with indifference. It is that from which all date their time, and count upon what is left. It is the nativity of our common Adam.
☻New Year's Day is every man's birthday.
☻The merry year is born
Like the bright berry from the naked thorn.
☻Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.
☻Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it's twice as onerous a duty.
☻New Year's eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights.
☻The Old Year has gone. Let the dead past bury its own dead. The New Year has taken possession of the clock of time. All hail the duties and possibilities of the coming twelve months!
☻Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.
☻Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.
http://sosonh.blogspot.com/
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
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Christmas SMS
May the good times and treasures of the present become the golden memories of tomorrow.Wish you lots of love, joy and happiness. MARRY CHRISTMAS. |
May your world be filled with warmth and good chear this Holy season, and throughout the year.Wish your christmas be filled with peace and love. Merry X-mas. |
I am dreaming of white Christmas , with every christmas card i write, May your days be merry and bright, and May all your christmases be white.Marry Christmas. |
I hope you have a wonderful christmas . have a great new year ! Hopefully santa will be extra good to you . enjoy your holidays ! |
A silent night, a star above, a blessed gift of hope and love. A blessed Christmas to you! |
If one night you wake up and a big fat male is trying to put you in a sack please don't be afraid because i told santa all i want for christmas is you. |
It was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us! And so, as Tiny Tim observed, "God Bless Us, Every One! |
Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. |
If one night a big fat man jumps in at your window grabs you and puts you in a sack don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for CHRISTMAS. |
From Home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas, brings us closer to each other. |
Lets welcome the year which is fresh and new,Lets cherish each moment it beholds, Lets celebrate this blissful New year. Merry X-mas. |
A Christmas candle is a lovely thing; It makes no noise at all, But softly gives itself away; While quite unselfish, it grows small. |
Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart. |
Don't expect too much of Christmas Day. You can't crowd into it any arrears of unselfishness and kindliness that may have accrued during the past twelve months. |
Bless us Lord, this Christmas, with quietness of mind; Teach us to be patient and always to be kind. |
Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. |
There is no ideal Christmas; only the one Christmas you decide to make as a reflection of your values, desires, affections, traditions. |
Joy resounds in the hearts of those who believe in the miracle of Christmas!
Wishing you all the peace, joy, and love of the season! Season's Greetings! |
Somehow, not only for Christmas, But all the long year through, The joy that you give to others, Is the joy that comes back to you. And the more you spend in blessing, The poor and lonely and sad, The more of your heart's possessing, Returns to you glad. |
Faith makes all things possible,Hope makes all things work,Love makes all things beautiful,May you have all the three for this Christmas.
MERRY CHRISTMAS! |
Bells are ringing the wishes of christmas day the flying snowflakes send my most sincere blessings to you merry christmas. |
Jingle bells Jingle bells what fun it is to wish our friends a very merry christmas. |
Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. |
Heap on the wood!-the wind is chill; But let it whistle as it will, We'll keep our Christmas merry still. |
Have an ideal Christmas;
an occasion that is celebrated as a reflection of your values, desires, affections, traditions. |
If one night a big fat man jumps in at your window, grabs you and puts you in a sack don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for CHRISTMAS.HAPPY CHRISTMAS |
(Language: Hindi)
Chritmas ka yeh pyara tyohaar jeevan mein laye khushiyan apaar, santa clause aaye aapke dwar, subhkamna hamari kare sweekar. Merry Christmas. |
Can I have your picture, so Santa Claus knows exactly what to give me. Happy Christmas. |
Lets welcome the year which is fresh
Lets welcome the year which is fresh and new,Lets cherish each moment it beholds, Lets celebrate this blissful New year. Merry X-mas |
()"""() ,*
( 'o' ) ,***
=(,,)=("')<-***
(""),,,("") "**
Roses 4 u...
MERRY CHRISTMAS to
U... |
May all the sweet magic
Of Christmas conspire
To gladden your hearts
And fill every desire. |
Ur friendship is a glowing ember through the yr n each december frm its warm n livin spark v kindle flame against da dark n with its shining radiance light our tree of faith on Christmas night. |
Christmas may be many things
or it may be a few.
For you, the joy
is each new toy;
for me;
it's watching U. |
Christmas is a time for magic and dreams come true. Hope yours is filled with lots of fun and sparkle too! Merry Christmas to you |
New is the year, new are the hopes and the aspirations, new is the resolution, new are the spirits and forever my warm wishes are for u.Have a promising and fulfilling new year. |
Lets welcome the year which is fresh and new,Lets cherish each moment it beholds, Lets celebrate this blissful New year. Merry X-mas |
if one night you wake up and a big fat male is trying to put you in a sack please don't be afraid because i told santa all i want for christmas is you. |
I hope you have a wonderful christmas . have a great new year ! Hopefully santa will be extra good to you . enjoy your holidays ! |
I am dreaming of white Christmas , with every christmas card i write, May your days be merry and bright, and May all your christmases be white.Happy Christmas. |
May your world be filled with warmth and good chear this Holy season, and throughout the year.Wish your christmas be filled with peace and love. Merry X-mas |
May the good times and treasures of the present become the golden memories of tomorrow.Wish you lots of love, joy and happiness. MARRY CHRISTMAS |
May the joy and peace of Christmas be with you all through the Year. Wishing you a season of blessings from heaven above. Happy Christmas |
If one night a big fat man jumps in at your window grabs you and puts you in a sack don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for CHRISTMAS |
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Saturday, December 8, 2007
Solve the below WORLD'S EASiEST QUiZ .
Solve the below WORLD'S EASiEST QUiZ .
Passing requires 5 correct awnsers.
Ok done...
(no cheating plz)
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
What colour is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Check your answers..... .......
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ANSWERS TO THE QUiZ:
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
Ans: 116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
Ans: Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut?
Ans: Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
Ans: November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
Ans: Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
Ans: Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name?
Ans: Albert
What color is a purple finch?
Ans: Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
Ans: New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Ans: Orange, of course.
5, 50, 500, 5000 - Store N number of mails in your inbox. Click here.
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
5, 50, 500, 5000 - Store N number of mails in your inbox. Click here.
A PARAGRAPH THAT EXPLAINS LIFE..!!
A PARAGRAPH THAT EXPLAINS LIFE..!!
Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of AIDS which he got due to infected blood he received during a heart surgery in 1983. From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: "Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease"?To this Arthur Ashe replied: The world over -- 5 crore children start playing tennis, 50 lakhs learn to play tennis, 5 lakhs learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD "Why me?". And today in pain I should not be asking GOD "Why me?" Happiness keeps u Sweet, Trials keep u Strong, Sorrow keeps u Human, Failure Keeps u Humble and Success keeps u glowing, but only Faith Keeps u Going..
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
Saturday, November 24, 2007
SOME INTERESTING FACTS
SOME INTERESTING FACTS
Saturday mail delivery in Canada was eliminated by Canada Post on February 1, 1969!
In Tokyo, a bicycle is faster than a car for most trips of less than 50 minutes!
There are 18 different animal shapes in the Animal Crackers cookie zoo!
Should there be a crash, Prince Charles and Prince William never travel on the same airplane as a precaution!
Your body is creating and killing 15 million red blood cells per second!
The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache on a standard playing card!
There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos!
There is one slot machine in Las Vegas for every eight inhabitants!
The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows. It was the fashion in Renaissance Florence to shave them off!
Every day 20 banks are robbed. The average take is $2,500!
The most popular first name in the world is Muhammad!
Tablecloths were originally meant to be served as towels with which dinner guests could wipe their hands and faces after eating!
Tourists visiting Iceland should know that tipping at a restaurant is considered an insult!
One car out of every 230 made was stolen last year!
The names of Popeye's four nephews are Pipeye, Peepeye, Pupeye, and Poopeye!
Until the nineteenth century, solid blocks of tea were used as money in Siberia!
The Nobel Peace Prize medal depicts three naked men with their hands on each other's shoulders!
When glass breaks, the cracks move faster than 3,000 miles per hour. To photograph the event, a camera must shoot at a millionth of a second!
A Boeing 747 airliner holds 57,285 gallons of fuel!
A car uses 1.6 ounces of gas idling for one minute. Half an ounce is used to start the average automobile!
The Philadelphia mint produces 26 million pennies per day!
A lightning bolt generates temperatures five times hotter than those found at the sun's surface!
A violin contains about 70 separate pieces of wood!
It is estimated that 4 million "junk" telephone calls, phone solicitations by persons or programmed machine are made every day in the United States!
It takes glass one million years to decompose, which means it never wears out and can be recycled an infinite amount of times!
Forest fires move faster uphill than downhill!
Almost half the newspapers in the world are published in the United States and Canada!
The two-foot long bird called a Kea that lives in New Zealand likes to eat the strips of rubber around car windows!
Most lipstick contains fish scales!
Skepticisms is the longest word that alternates hands when typing!
One ragweed plant can release as many as one billion grains of pollen!
It's illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while you're sitting on a curb in St. Louis!
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigleys gum!
No piece of square dry paper can be folded more than 7 times in half!
A group of geese on the ground is a gaggle, a group of geese in the air is a skein!
Over 2500 left handed people a year are killed from using products made for right handed people!
There are more than 10 million bricks in the Empire State Building!
If you counted 24 hours a day, it would take 31,688 years to reach one trillion!
Taphephobia is the fear of being buried alive!
A crocodile always grows new teeth to replace the old teeth!
The sun is 330,330 times larger than the earth!
Clinophobia is the fear of beds!
A 'jiffy' is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second!
Porcupines float in water!
Pinocchio is Italian for "pine eye"!
The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over a lazy dog." uses every letter of the alphabet!
The average life span of a major league baseball is 5-7 pitches!
The Mint once considered producing doughnut-shaped coins!
The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is "uncopyrightable"!
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds! During your lifetime, you'll eat about 60,000 pounds of food, that's the weight of about 6 elephants!
Some ribbon worms will eat themselves if they cant find any food!
Dolphins sleep with one eye open!
The worlds oldest piece of chewing gum is over 9000 years old!
In space, astronauts cannot cry properly, because there is no gravity, so the tears can't flow down their faces!
There are more plastic flamingos in the U..S, than real ones!
About 3000 years ago, most Egyptians died by the time they were 30!
More people use blue toothbrushes, than red ones!
A sneeze travels out your mouth at over 100 m.p.h.!
Your ribs move about 5 million times a year, every time you breathe !
In the White House, there are 13,092 knives, forks and spoons!
Slugs have 4 noses!
Recycling one glass jar, saves enough energy to watch T.V for 3 hours!
Lightning strikes about 6,000 times per minute on this planet!
Owls are one of the only birds who can see the color blue!
The average American/Canadian drinks about 600 sodas a year!
It was once against the law to slam your car door in a city in Switzerland!
There wasn't a single pony in the Pony Express, just horses!
Honeybees have a type of hair on their eyes!
There are over 58 million dogs in the U.S!
Dogs and cats consume over $11 billion worth of pet food a year!
Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails!
Humans blink over 10,000,000 times a year!
In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II was named an "Honorary Harlem Globetrotter."!
Every second, Americans collectively eat one hundred pounds of chocolate!
A fetus develops fingerprints at eighteen weeks!
The fear of vegetables is called Lachanophobia!
There are approximately fifty Bibles sold each minute across the world!
Every year, kids in North America spend close to half a billion dollars on chewing gum!An earthquake on Dec. 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards!
A person uses approximately fifty-seven sheets of toilet paper each day!
Honolulu is the only place in the United States that has a royal palace!
One gallon of used motor oil can ruin approximately one million gallons of fresh water!
More money is spent on gardening than on any other hobby!
In 32 years. there are about 1 billion seconds!
Rice paper does not have any rice in it!
Baby robins eat 14 feet of earthworms every day!
In England, in the 1880's, "Pants" was considered a dirty word!
Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin!
The blesbok, a South African antelope, is almost the same color as grapejuice!
The average person laughs 13 times a day!
Dogs can hear sounds that you cant!
Men are 6 times more likely to be struck by lightning than women!
It is estimated that millions of trees in the world are accidentally planted by squirrels who bury nuts and then forget where they hid them!
Ernest Vincent Wright wrote a novel, "Gadsby", which contains over 50,000 words -- none of them with the letter E!
Of all the words in the English language, the word set has the most definitions!
A toothpick is the object most often choked on by Americans!
Every 45 seconds, a house catches on fire in the United States!
The sun is 330,330 times larger than the earth!
The most used letter in the English alphabet is 'E', and 'Q' is the least used!
There are more than 50,000 earthquakes throughout the world every year!
The original name for the butterfly was 'flutterby'!
Dogs and cats, like humans, are either right or left handed... or is that paws?!
The opposite sides of a dice cube always add up to seven!
Nose prints are used to identify dogs, just like humans use fingerprints!
Bulls are colorblind, therefore will usually charge at a matador's waving cape no matter what color it is -- be it red or neon yellow!
Apples are more efficient than caffeine in keeping people awake in the mornings!
Smelling bananas and/or green apples (smelling, not eating) can help you lose weight!
A hard working adult sweats up to 4 gallons per day. Most of the sweat evaporates before a person realizes it's there, though!
The average ice berg weighs 20,000,000 tons!
The poison-arrow frog has enough poison to kill about 2,200 people!
A lump of pure gold the size of a matchbox can be flattened into a sheet the size of a tennis court!
After eating, a housefly regurgitates its food and then eats it again!
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
Now you can chat without downloading messenger. Click here to know how.
How to Success
How to Success
PLAN while others are playing.
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STUDY while others are sleeping.
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DECIDE while others are delaying.
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PREPARE while others are daydreaming.
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BEGIN while others are procrastinating.
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WORK while others are wishing.
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SAVE while others are wasting .
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LISTEN while others are talking.
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SMILE while others are frowning.
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COMMEND while others are criticizing.
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PERSIST while others are quitting.
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PLAN while others are playing.
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STUDY while others are sleeping.
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DECIDE while others are delaying.
*******
PREPARE while others are daydreaming.
*******
BEGIN while others are procrastinating.
*******
WORK while others are wishing.
*******
SAVE while others are wasting .
*******
LISTEN while others are talking.
*******
SMILE while others are frowning.
*******
COMMEND while others are criticizing.
*******
PERSIST while others are quitting.
*******
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
Forgot the famous last words? Access your message archive online. Click here.
Monday, November 19, 2007
PEOPLE WONDER WHY THE CALL CENTRE GUYS R PAID SO MUCH......FOR JUST BEING ON THE PHONE. TAKE A LOOK:
PEOPLE WONDER WHY THE CALL CENTRE GUYS R PAID SO MUCH......FOR JUST BEING ON THE PHONE. TAKE A LOOK:
(1)
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
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(2)
Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support: "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
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(3)
Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer: "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."
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(4)
Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support: ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)
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(5)
Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
Tech support:
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(6)
Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
Tech support :
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(7)
Tech Support: "What operating system are you running?"
Customer: "Pentium."
Tech support:
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(
Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."
Tech support :
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(9)
Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."
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(10)
Customer: "How do I print my voicemail?"
Tech support:
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(11)
Customer: "You've got to fix my computer.
I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
Tech support :
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(12)
Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."
Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"
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(13)
Tech Support: "What does the screen say now?"
Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support: "Well?"
Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"
Tech support:
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(14)
Best of the Lot
A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: (keep quite)
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
Tech support:
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech support: (hush hush)
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NO SMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS .
Let me know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with NO SMOKE.
Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech support: How did you come to that conclusion?
Tech support: (hush hush)
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(15)
Customer care officer: I need product identification no: right now
and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unlimited freedom, unlimited storage. Get it now
(1)
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(2)
Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support: "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(3)
Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer: "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(4)
Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support: ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(5)
Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
Tech support:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(6)
Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
Tech support :
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(7)
Tech Support: "What operating system are you running?"
Customer: "Pentium."
Tech support:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(
Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."
Tech support :
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(9)
Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(10)
Customer: "How do I print my voicemail?"
Tech support:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(11)
Customer: "You've got to fix my computer.
I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
Tech support :
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(12)
Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."
Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(13)
Tech Support: "What does the screen say now?"
Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support: "Well?"
Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"
Tech support:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(14)
Best of the Lot
A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: (keep quite)
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
Tech support:
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech support: (hush hush)
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NO SMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS .
Let me know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with NO SMOKE.
Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech support: How did you come to that conclusion?
Tech support: (hush hush)
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(15)
Customer care officer: I need product identification no: right now
and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
Unlimited freedom, unlimited storage. Get it now
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
35 Interesting Facts You Might Be Unaware Of:
1. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."
2. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt"
3. Almonds are members of the peach family.
4. The symbol on the "pound" key (#) is called an octothorpe.
5. The dot over the letter 'i' is called a tittle.
6. Ingrown toenails are hereditary.
7. The word "set" has more definitions than any other word in the English language.
8. "Underground" is the only word in the English language that begins and ends with the letters "und."
9. There are only four words in the English language which end in "-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
10. The longest word in the English language, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is pneumonoultramicros copicsilicovolca noconiosis.
11. The only other word with the same amount of letters is its plural: pneumonoultramicros copicsilicovolca noconiosesl.
12. The longest place-name still in use is Taumatawhakatangiha ngakoauauotamate aturipukakapikim aungahoronukupok aiwe-nuakit natahu, a New Zealand hill.
13. Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reinade los Angeles de Porciuncula" and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size,L.A.
14. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
15. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
16. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button. It was eliminated when he was sewn up after surgery.
17. Telly Savalas and Louis Armstrong died on their birthdays.
18. Donald Duck's middle name is Fauntleroy.
19. The muzzle of a lion is like a fingerprint - no two lions have the same pattern of whiskers.
21. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
23. There is a seven-letter word in the English language that contains ten words without rearranging any of its letters, "therein": the,there, he, in, rein, her, here, ere, therein, herein.
24. Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
26. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
27. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
28. Cranberries are sorted for ripeness by bouncing them; a fully ripened cranberry can be dribbled like a basketball.
30. The letters KGB stand for Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosti
31. 'Stewardesses' is the longest English word that is typed with only the left hand.
33. The combination "ough" can be pronounced in nine different ways; the following sentence contains them all: "A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed."
34. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
35. Facetious and abstemious contain all the vowels in the correct order, as does arsenious, meaning "containing arsenic."
36. Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the Australian seal for that reason.
37. Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only have about ten.
38. The word "Checkmate" in chess comes from the Persian phrase "Shah Mat," which means "the king is dead."
39. The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
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Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Mobile Telephone Number Codes for India
Mobile Telephone Numbering System
If you get a missed call from unknown mobile no., find out from where you have been called with this table.
Abbriviations AP - ANDHRA PRADESH AS - ASSAM BR - BIHAR & JHARKHAND CH - CHENNAI DL - DELHI GJ - GUJRAT HP - HIMACHAL PRADESH HR - HARYANA JK - JAMMU & KASHMIR KL - KERALA KN - KARNATAKA KO - KOLKATA MH - MAHARASHTRA MP - MADHYA PRADESH & CHHATTISGARH MU - MUMBAI NE - NORTH EAST OR - ORISSA PB - PUNJAB RJ - RAJASTHAN TN - TAMILNADU UE - UTTAR PRADESH(EAST) UW - UTTAR PRADESH(WEST) & UTTARANCHAL WB - WEST BENGAL & ANDAMAN NIKOBAR Cellular Operator A - AIRTEL a - AIRCEL LTD. B - BPL MOBILE D - DISHNET WIRELESS LTD. F - HFCL CONNECT H - HUTCH I - IDEA M - DOLPHIN (MTNL) R - RELIANCE TELECOM PVT. LTD. r - RAINBOW (SHYAM) (CDMA) RIM - RELIANCE INDIA MOBILE (CDMA) S - SPICE COMMUNICATIONS CELLONE- BHARAT SANCHAR NIGAM LIMITED TATA INDICOM (CDMA) Note: 1. This is a list of four digit mobile number prefixes(code) of all the the telecom operators across the country. By the first four digit of the mobile number you will know the telecom circle and telecom operator of the subscriber. 2. The '-' and '--' indicates that these codes have not been allotted to any cellular operators. 3. I don't know the cellular operator and circle for the code with entries made by * and **. 4. The entries in the bold letters are the new codes and have not been confirmed by various sources and the confirmed entries are in regular text." 5. If you finds any wrong entry or any new entry please let me know | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
WiNnErS aRe nOt qUiTtEr'S
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